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  • UN releases land mine awareness ad

    Posted on January 31st, 2005 Finster 2 comments

    The UN released an ad campaign to get us to be more aware of the problem of land mines worldwide. I think the original UN commercial is in really really bad taste. Let me give you the version that the UN released.

    And an alternate version that appeared on the internet some time later.

    I swear, this must’ve been taken straight out of Monty Python’s Flying Circus.

    WARNING: These videos do depict a simulated land mine blowing up a teenage girl as she plays soccer. I guess the UN figures such grotesque depictions will make me want to give them a billion dollars or something.

  • Super Mega Powerful DSL Cat

    Posted on January 27th, 2005 Finster No comments

    I was browsing around on and happened upon their DSL page. There was something out of place on that page. Namely, this:

    The first question that came to mind was, “What does a cat and milk have to do with Verizon’s DSL service?” I just don’t know. If I get Verizon DSL do they give me a cuddly kitten? It looks like they’ll throw in a free bowl of milk, as well. This kitten also appears to be somehow trained to live in or near computer monitors. Perhaps that’s why there’s a bottle of milk on this monitor. The cat may derive comfort from this. I hope this is not the case. If I had Verizon DSL, I’d want to be sure that I could view anything I wanted, not just high-resolution images of milk and other cat-friendly entreés.

    It’s just weird to have that cat there, even kind of scary. Is this some sort of strange avatar of the DSL Internet gods? Perhaps this cat represents some sort of household deity as it did to the ancient Egyptians. “If you subscribe to Verizon DSL, we will ensure that prosperity smiles upon you through your very own divine totem.” The cat was also the symbol of the Egyptian goddess, Bastet. Bastet was a daughter of Ra and at times was considered a moon goddess, analogous to Artemis. This would make the cat a symbol of the hunt, or perhaps nighttime. That doesn’t make any sense, either.

    Or perhaps it’s something more nefarious… The monitor could be a dimensional portal into a parallel universe. The bottle of milk appearing on the monitor is a clue that Verizon DSL allowed some sort of super-intelligent, internet-using cat to slip through this portal into our world. Since Verizon managed to photograph this event, I can only hope that they have not been completely conquered by this “SuperCat”.

  • China bans 50 video games

    Posted on January 26th, 2005 Finster No comments

    I wish I could live in China. Because if I lived in China, they would ban video games for me, and also restrict access to Google. China is great.

    In all seriousness, they decided to ban games that were being pirated, so they’re spinning it like this:

    As part of the effort to protect intellectual property rights and create a good environment for Chinese youth, the State General Administration of Press and Publication (SGAPP) together with the anti-porn and illegal publication offices, created a list of 50 illegal electronic games in a nationwide check-up on electronic publication and software markets.

    I love it. So, among some of the titles banned are games like Battlefield Vietnam, Vietcong: Fist Alpha, and Conflict Vietnam. China really cares about creating a good environment for its youth. We wouldn’t want the Youth of China to see what went on during the Vietnam War. Especially not from a greedy capitalist pig-dog point of view.

    I noticed they’re also banning The Sims 2. Okay, well, China’s not all bad.

  • Barbara Boxer: Want some cheese with your whine?

    Posted on January 24th, 2005 Finster No comments

    This is stupid.

    “I gave Dr. Rice many opportunities to address specific issues. Instead, she said I was impugning her integrity,” Mrs. Boxer said.

    BECAUSE YOU WERE. This is what she said to Dr. Rice:

    “I personally believe — this is my personal view — that your loyalty to the mission you were given, to sell this war, overwhelmed your respect for the truth,”

    If you accuse someone of putting honesty and respect for truth behind ANYTHING else, that is what normal people would refer to as “impugning her integrity.”

    Does California have a law that allows for the recall of a senator? Between this and being the ONLY senator to vote against certifying the 2004 electoral college returns, I don’t think I can take 6 more years of her shenanigans.

  • To be fair to CBS…

    Posted on January 20th, 2005 Finster No comments

    This is a transcript of a 60 Minutes II report on Waco. Good stuff. Of course, I suppose this is all made up…

    January 25, 2001
    Producer: Christopher Martin

    DAN RATHER (voice over video)
    What really happened at Waco? Did federal agents fire shots into the Branch Davidian compound? For years, the government has said “no.” But this surveillance video may tell a different story. The FBI has repeatedly said no FBI person, at any time, fired into the compound.

    Read the rest of this entry »

  • CBS vs. Barrett

    Posted on January 20th, 2005 Finster 2 comments

    CBS (who never makes up anything) aired a report on 60 Minutes this past Sunday titled, “The Big Gun.” This report examined the impending DOOM that will fall upon us because of the .50 caliber Barret M82A1 rifle.

    For those of you that don’t know. The M82A1 is a very large weapon.

    It fires bullets like the big one on the bottom. The tiny one? That tiny 30-30 round is STILL bigger than the caliber used by the D.C. sniper. It doesn’t take a big bullet to kill people.:

    Most of the 60 Minutes report showed interviews with Ronnie Barrett, inventor of the Barrett rifles, and Tom Diaz. Tom Diaz’s tagline was “Gun Control Advocate.” Anyone that defines their existence using the word “advocate” needs to go get a job. I hear McDonald’s is always hiring.

    The 60 Minutes report was the usual anti-gun diatribe. In fact, it pretty much followed my Gun Control Mad-libs.

    The [Popular Gun] is the most [Adjective] weapon ever created! It is a travesty that such a [Synonym of hellspawn] could be available to [Choose two: terrorists, civilians, mailmen, hunters, kids that play video games, Charlton Heston]. Congress needs to pass a law RIGHT NOW to help [Verb] citizens and thwart the [Adjective] NRA once and for all!

    I can handle another news report about how evil guns are. Besides a few California law-makers, the rest of the country pretty much accepts the moral stand that the 2nd Amendment guarantees the right to bear arms. That means “own guns” for those of you in Rio Linda.

    It drives me absolutely nuts when an Advocate like Mr. Diaz starts vomiting out made-up facts like a bulimic. For instance, a popular myth perpetuated by Diaz’s Violence Policy Center is that, to quote the 60 Minutes writeup:

    It would be a weapon that could do a lot of damage ? no question about that.

    This is exactly what the FBI learned in 1993 at Waco when Branch Davidians fired a Barrett .50-caliber sniper rifle at them.

    In response, the FBI deployed Bradley fighting vehicles for protection. But even that wasn?t sufficient, and heavier armor was brought in.

    No, no, NO!

    Here is a statement directly from Diaz’s website,

    David Koresh and his fellow Branch Davidians had several 50 caliber sniper rifles among the weapons in their substantial arsenal. During the 1993 siege at the Waco, Texas compound, FBI agents used armored vehicles to protect against the weapons. This decision was made after four Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms agents were killed in the initial assault.

    Let’s go through this one item at a time.

    David Koresh and his fellow Branch Davidians had several 50 caliber sniper rifles

    According to federal testimony, they had TWO. Now would also be a good time to note that owning a .50 Barrett rifle is LEGAL in 49 states. (Thanks, Ahnold for infinging the rights of Californians.)

    During the 1993 siege at the Waco, Texas compound, FBI agents used armored vehicles to protect against the weapons.

    The Barrett rifles were NOT fired during the siege. There is no evidence to support this claim. There is, however, significant evidence to support the allegations that the FBI fired .50 Barretts INTO the Branch Davidian compound.

    FBI agents used armored vehicles to protect against the weapons. This decision was made after four Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms agents were killed in the initial assault.

    This is great. What we have here is a typical trick used by journalists. This statement implies that the FBI decided to use armored vehicles because of the threat posed by the Barrett rifles. This is not true. It is true that they rolled in armor after 4 agents died, but those agents were NOT shot by Barrett rifles. There is no evidence to support this except for a single report from the GAO claiming that an FBI agent testified that they were fired on by .50 Barrett rifles. Unfortuantely, none of the OFFICIAL Waco documents concerning the incident indicate any such thing.

    I just get so sick of this garbage. This tripe on CBS is nothing but fear-mongering.


  • I Hate Moving

    Posted on January 19th, 2005 Finster 1 comment

    I haven’t updated this site as much as I’d like to. Believe it or not, I have a few entries in rough draft format waiting to be published. The problem is that I haven’t been able to sit down at my home computer long enough to hammer out some of the entries I want to make. This stems from simultaneously trying to live in 2 places at once. Why am I living in 2 places at once?

    I hate moving.

    Large items like TV’s and computers are still sitting there awaiting transport because I only have internet at one location, the location that I don’t spend much time at anymore. However, I don’t want to remove my computer and such from the internet, because I probably won’t be installing broadband at my new place just yet.

    So there’s the quandry. Who knows what’ll happen?

  • California

    Posted on January 11th, 2005 Finster No comments

    This is what happens when it rains too much in California. Sheesh.

  • Let it snow, let it snow, let it… oh shut up.

    Posted on January 5th, 2005 Finster No comments

    Snow doesn’t bother me.

    Really. I actually kind of like the stuff.

    What does bother me is the total lack of intelligence that the city of Provo exhibits when it comes to snow removal. I leave my apartment at a little before 8am this morning. 8 inches of snow are piled up on my Nissan pickup. I know this is going to be a crappy morning. I look to the nearby street and see that traffic is moving at a snail’s pace. Why? Because people have been driving a MAIN DRAG in Provo for over 2 hours and the 8 inches of snow that had fallen is now compressed into 1/2 inch thick ice.

    Salt? What’s that? Apparently Provo City has never heard of the stuff. Melts ice, you know.

    I pull out of my apartment complex and begin to slowly make my way to work. Eventually I get to a street where they went ahead and put salt down. No plowing. Just salt. 8 inches of Snow + Salt + No Plowing = Slush. NEWS FLASH! Slush is only slightly less dangerous to drive on than ice.

    The end result of this is a 40 minute drive to work when it normally takes me 10 minutes. Thanks, Provo. You guys rock.

    When I lived in South Dakota, and there was an overnight accumulation of 8 inches, ALL of the main roads in town would be plowed and salted by 6am, and they would’ve also made a serious dent in the side streets. That was little ol’ South Dakota. Therefore, South Dakota > Utah.