Who buys this crap?

A few months ago, I got a press release about some new Playstation Home “outfits” available from SEGA. Apparently, for €3 you can get one of these costumes and prance around Playstation Home dressed up as a colonial marine or a predator.

I want to know who buys this crap. Seriously. Who is it? Obviously, they are the same people who are buying Winnie the Pooh t-shirts for their Xbox Live Avatars.

The whole concept of Xbox Live Avatars isn’t completely terrible, I guess, but the fact that they are charging real money so I can put some kind of stupid shirt on my avatar… is just bizarre. It almost proves the insane ideal that anything will be bought by someone at some point in time just because there is a price attached.

If this crap were free would anyone download it? Aye, there’s the rub. This is something I like to think of as “the pet rock phenomenon”. Take something that is pretty much worthless, attach an arbitrarily low price to it, and suddenly it has worth. I guess that sums up this whole Playstation Home business model. It isn’t pure evil (don’t touch it!) or anything, but what happens when the PS3 and Xbox 360 go away? Never gonna happen, you say? Au contraire, mon frere.

The part of all this that is the most infuriating to me, is that Sony and Microsoft wouldn’t be selling this garbage unless there were enough people buying it to make it profitable. That’s the worst part of this whole thing. This whole stupid, inane, pointless endeavor is actually working. I’ll admit, though, the face that Xbox Live is full of people who buy this crap makes me reconsider even subscribing to the service. Auto-renew: off!

Maybe that’s me being elitist, but here I am… still subscribed to Xbox Live. So, who buys this crap? Apparently… I do.

Microsoft: The New EA?

With EA being a bit less of a stinker in recent months, despite a few DRM black eyes, there has to be a new (old?) evil empire, and lately Microsoft has really been cheesing me off.

New Xbox Experience Sucks

I went quite a while without having an avatar. Eventually, I got tricked into selecting one as I tried (and failed) to get an online game of Castle Crashers going. Bottom line is, that according to OXM, they’re closing the “loophole” that was allowing me to back out of the Avatar process. I honestly don’t see what the point of having an avatar is. It’s a rip off of the Mii. The idea of selling clothes makes me want to eat Microsoft points cards until I retch. Better that than spend them on idiotic clothing.

The themes are also quite stupid. Take away the one part of the Xbox Live interface that wasn’t completely retarded (the friends’ list) and replace it with this godawful swooshy merry-go-round effect where it’s not even apparent what the hell people are doing because there’s so much extra noise from the avatar and themes. It’s gotten to the point that I don’t even bother with the default Xbox interface anymore. All I do is hit the middle button and pop up the Guide. You know, where you can find all the actually useful menus (including the old-style friends’ list).

I know this is reactionary, but I honestly am considering NOT renewing my Xbox Live subscription. I’m not saying OMG BOYCOTT, but I am just so… sick… of these stupid avatars.

Microsoft, not Developers, Determines Prices

There has been a never ending tale of tears and misery when it comes to Xbox Live DLC pricing. Horse Armor, Godfather codes, Lumines, just to name a few of the controversies. Many times, throughout these debacles, Microsoft has stated that it’s the developer that makes these choices. Blame them!

Enter Doug Lombardi, VP of Marketing over at Valve Software. Shacknews reported him saying that while the updates for Left 4 Dead would be free for PC, Microsoft was forcing them to charge for the same DLC on the Xbox 360. Naturally, this begs the question: What about the free Gears of War maps and the free Halo 3 content? I guess if it’s a Microsoft published game, you don’t HAVE to charge for DLC, after all.

Left 4 Dead is one title that is sorely in need of free content. Sixty dollars is far too much for far too little. The $50 Left 4 Dead package on Steam looks downright delicious, comparatively. $50 + lots of free updates vs. $60 + $10 for a DLC pack. Fail.

Microsoft trying to beat EA to see who can kill off more game developers

Halo Wars, created by the late Ensemble Studios will apparently include this achievement:

Ready for the Sequel – 100% completing – 75G

Fascinating. You include an achievement promising a sequel, but then destroy the people that would be best equipped to create it.

Everytime Microsoft kills a studio that I used to love, I’m going to butcher a kitten and feed it to my Corgi. With the destruction of FASA Interactive and Ensemble, she now has a voracious appetite for kitty.

Only Microsoft can end the suffering.